Late in 2012, John and I began seeking God's direction in our upcoming transition back to central KY. When we began this journey two years ago this month, we knew it would be short term and everyone close to us was aware that once John finished his degree we would be transitioning back to central KY. I had the opportunity to interview for a job in Elizabethtown in December 2012 and after much dicussion and prayer, we decided it wouldn't hurt to interview. During the interview I was offered a position as children's mental health theapist at a inpatient hospital. Fearful and nervous, John and I prayed and discussed in depth what our options were and where we felt our lives were being led. In January 2013, I took the position here in Elizabethtown out of faith knowing that this would be a huge change for our marriage and family. John would have to remain in Eastern KY for about a year to finish school and I would rent a house in Elizabethtown. As time progressed and I placed my notice in at my current job at the time, my spirit continued to stir and debate if we were making the righ choice. It felt like daily we were discussing this transition and several tears later we decided I would make the transition but live with my grandma/grandpa Gillenwater in their basement until John transitioned back to help save some money. On February 10, I packed my car and moved from Eastern KY back to Elizabethtown. Probably one of the most difficult times of my life as I left my husband for an extended period for the first time since we have been married. Still debating in my flesh and mind if we had made the right decision I started training at my new job on February 12. Everything was going well at my training that week and on Friday, February 15 I entered my last day of training. This was no different than any other day. I got up, got ready, ate breakfast and left for work expecting my day to be normal. Expecting to come home to my grandma having dinner cooked and my grandfather sitting at the kitchen table watching who was going up and down the road...lol. But this day was not like any other day...this day was different...this day was surprising, shocking and unforseen...
On February 15, as I was in training, I got a phone call that would change my life forever. My mom and dad had shown up at my new place of employment to inform me that my grandfather Gillenwater had passed away that morning at home. The home I had just moved into with him and grandmother. As I stood at my new job, crying and in shock, I remember thinking, "This is not real, he is at the hospital just like before and everything is going to be fine. It has to be. He was fine last night, he laughed and picked on me. They are mistaken." But in reality, it was real, it true and it hit hard like a ton of bricks. I remember the days that followed and leaning on my family for support and comfort. A lot of people do not understand the context or love of my family. You don't understand unless you have walked in our shoes of unexpected deaths in the last 10 years. Through these 10 years, since the death of my aunt, we have learned that there is no one else in this world that can love and comfort like your family. As the days passed, I realized and understand the true purpose of God's plan on this journey. He knew exactly when I needed to transition and where I needed to be. I needed to be here, in this home with my grandmother. You never know when God's journey will take you to a place you never thought you would go. It is amazing how God orders and ordains our steps. A lot of people looked at John and I like we were crazy when we transitioned to Eastern KY and a lot of people looked at us like we were crazy when we made the decision for me to transition back to central KY. This has been a wild ride and journey, but I would take nothing any different. It has taught me a lot about myself, my family, my marriage, my faith and my profession. As I end this long time coming blog, I leave you with pictures of my family on the Gillenwater side from Christmas and the weekend of my grandfathers death. I am truly blessed as up until February I still had both sets of grandparents. And I still count myself as blessed because I still have many more memories to come with the Baker's, as well as the Gillenwaters. ENJOY :)
As a mental health professional, I blogged about practicing what you preach. Here is one of those instances of practicing releasing your grief. Even in our grief, we found ways to have fun and ease our minds in Kohls ;)
So fortunate that for Christmas we had all of the grandkids and family together for my grandfather's last Christmas. And if you know Scott (top right corner) you know this picture would not be true to our personalities without his humor ;)
And lastly, a picture of my grandfather a little over a year before his death. This man taught all of grandkids what it truly meant to live the life on a farm. From tractor rides, to fishing, to gardening...this man taught us all something very valuable ;)
Even when people doubt and tell you are making a mistake, hold fast to God's promise because in the end it is the ONE and ONLY thing that prevail! I am so thankful for God's promise and provision...
No comments:
Post a Comment